Bad Parkour.
I may not know what I'm doing with my life, but at least I'm also very poor. — Kevin Farzad (@KevinFarzad) June 9, 2014 via
Might have a kid named Ward so I can collect child support by telling him father to pay it for Ward — Paige (@PeachCoffin) June
When life gives you lemons just use them as a garnish the next time you teach a man to fish. — Paige (@PeachCoffin) June 8,
"Girl, you can call me Tapas because there's a real good chance I'm going to leave you unsatisfied." — Tim Siedell (@badbanana) June 8, 2014

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RIP all those babies that died when Amelia Bedelia was told to "baby-sit" them. — Ken Jennings (@KenJennings) June 7, 2014 via http://twitter.com/KenJennings