It's kind of crazy how paranoid I was about drinking backwash as a kid, knowing the things I've swallowed as an adult. — desi jedeikin
The opposite of Reese Witherspoon is KitKat Blossomfork — Paige (@PeachCoffin) May 15, 2014 via http://twitter.com/PeachCoffin
*puts butter, sour cream, and chives inside gun & points it at you* Back off pal this thing’s loaded — Paige (@PeachCoffin) May 15, 2014
[Drive-thru church] "Hey I'd like a large body of Christ with a side of really old candy from grandmas pocket Oh and can I get an
Sad how some stick figures get stuck working the hangman game, while others get to have nice families on the back of SUVs — Marpee
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achmed13 shared this story from  FAIL Blog.
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Parents recently received this letter, it is believed to be a senior prank, to notify that their daughters were undergoing an “inspection”.
This is similar to a flyer sent around to Lowell High School students:
As noted in Daily Mail:
Believe it or not, penis inspector Richard L. Dong is not real, and Lowell High School doesn’t actually require its seniors to pass a penis inspection before they’re allowed to graduate – rather, school officials believe the amusing fliers are just a senior prank orchestrated by members of the school’s graduating class.
Submitted by:
(via The Gnargantuan12)
Gentlemen prefer blondes, but are equally cool with fucking a rubber vagina hidden inside of a flashlight case. — Ethan T. Berlin (@EthanTBerlin) May 14,
Instead of protesting gay weddings, protest destination weddings. "I BELIEVE MARRIAGE SHOULD BE BETWEEN…1 HOUR & 1.5 HOURS FROM MY HOUSE!" — Louis Katz (@louiskatz)
Guess what came in the mail today? Me! I did! — Mike Leffingwell (@mikeleffingwell) May 14, 2014 via http://twitter.com/mikeleffingwell