"He who sleeps with itchy bum, wakes with sticky finger" is the last thing my 8yo said to me before I decided to never hug
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achmed13 shared this story from  http://atmidnightcc.tumblr.com/.
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We are engorged with #DietMusicians tweets! You guys rocked the Hashtag War for reals! Tune into Monday’s @midnight to see the winner announced on the air!
Before Twitter, it was cool how you could like comedy & listen to people telling jokes without also having to wish them happy birthday. —
Every couple's argument that happens in sign language is borderline domestic violence. — Liana Maeby (@lianamaeby) January 3, 2014 via http://twitter.com/lianamaeby
Maybe humans don’t eat healthy because when we see a salad our ancestral brain thinks, hey, clothes. — mar aggressive (@behindyourback) January 3, 2014 via
the most disturbing thing about the Beauty and the Beast cartoon: someone or something fucked a teapot — Mary Charlene (@IamEnidColeslaw) January 3, 2014 via
Thought "I wish I could just 'like' things people say out loud" before realizing that is what human laughter is for and we're all doomed.
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FAIL Blog.
A nanny is someone who takes care of Muppet babies not someone you stick your dick in, Jude Law. #tweetsfrom2005 — Beige (@PeachCoffin) January 2,