My psychiatrist prescribed me an odd number of pills for my OCD and I'M THE ONE WHO'S CRAZY?! — Shari VanderWerf (@shariv67) January 16, 2014
"Oh my my. Oh hell yes. I got to look up that party dress." – Peeping Tom Petty — Katrina Whipp (@SheBanggs) January 16, 2014
I able to butter toast with head but now I got butter on my head — birdsrightsactivist (@ProBirdRights) January 15, 2014 via http://twitter.com/ProBirdRights
If a bunch of flamboyant magic bears stared and shot a rainbow at me until I "cheered" up, I'd pretend to be happy so fast.
The cool thing about the new Mumford & Sons book is if you scrape it against a washboard it's also their new record. — rachel
It figures that the moment I kill all the ants in my house, I suddenly have half a million tiny crumbs I need help moving.
If a road runs parallel to a river, there's probably a bridge nearby. No reason to cross five lanes of traffic, Frogger, you dumbshit. —
I guess a layover in Charlotte isn't that bad considering I could be stuck in Samantha, Miranda or Carrie. #sorry — OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) January 14,
I have a layover in Charlotte this Friday and that's not nearly as sexy as it sounds. — OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) January 14, 2014 via http://twitter.com/OhNoSheTwitnt