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Watch tonight’s new @midnight to find out which of these #AnimalTVShows scored the highest ratings.
*2yo approaches with small papercut* "Do you need a kiss?" I ask. "No, I need something that works," she says. — Amanda Mancino (@Manda_like_wine) February 24, 2014
"I feel like a million bucks!" —doe preparing for gangbang — Paige (@PeachCoffin) February 24, 2014 via http://twitter.com/PeachCoffin
My diet could best be described as, "unchaperoned child at a birthday party." — Jen Statsky (@jenstatsky) February 21, 2014 via http://twitter.com/jenstatsky
Girl, am I Iwo Jima because it takes six Marines to raise my flagpole. Wait hold on a second — Ken Jennings (@KenJennings) February 23,
Embracing Potholes by Turning Them Into Hilarious Imaginative Scenes.